Where I'm Going Read online

  And he certainly wasn’t in the mood to pretend to be straight, especially not to soothe some stranger’s ego.

  It was a little surprising that the man was there by himself, though. Reign had just assumed that a man who was that good-looking would have been taken by an equally beautiful woman. Whatever, though. The man’s dating status was really none of Reign’s concern.

  “Oh, that’s cool,” the man said, further surprising Reign as he shrugged. “Both my brothers are gay. I’m actually here because one of them just got married. My name’s Benji, by the way.”

  Even though Reign hadn’t been looking for conversation, and wasn’t sure he wanted to continue the one he’d found himself in, he still nodded absently and shook the man’s—Benji’s—hand. He may have even smiled a little as Benji’s words registered in his head.

  He was on the island for a wedding. A gay wedding. Reign squinted a little as the pieces began to fall into place. He’d seen the breathless gossip sites that had reported on Chase Carhart’s island wedding, and had thought at the time that it would have been cool to have caught a glimpse of the wedding party, but a little online digging had told Reign that they’d all left the island just as he’d been arriving the day before.

  Which was just his luck, really. Especially on this particular vacation.

  But what were the odds that this guy was there for another gay wedding that week? And hadn’t he heard somewhere that Chase’s brother was his manager? Chase’s brother, who—if Reign’s memory could be believed—had an uncommon name, like… Benji?

  No, it couldn’t be. He refused to believe that he was sitting just inches away from the brother of one of his favorite singers. Actually talking to the guy. It was the kind of thing that made for a great story back home, but also the kind of story that Reign probably wouldn’t have believed if it had come from someone else. Yet here he was, and there Benji was, still waiting, still smiling.

  “Did you say your name was Benji?” Reign finally asked, even though he knew damn well what the man had said. Then, just to be sure, “Benji Carhart?”

  “That’s what my driver’s license says,” Benji deadpanned, quirking an eyebrow. “How did you know it was me, though? I try to stay out of the limelight.”

  “When your brother is Chase Carhart, I don’t think it matters what you try to do.”

  “Ha,” Benji barked out a short laugh that didn’t sound the least bit amused. “Tell me about it.” Benji took a long drink, never taking his eyes off Reign. “So, what’s your story?”

  Reign blinked. “What? I don’t have a story.”

  “Sure you do. You already know mine, so… what’s yours?”

  “I, um,” Reign paused and took a deep breath. Was he really about to spill his guts and his pathetically sad story to this stranger? This… sort-of-celebrity? God. Well, fuck it. Maybe it would help to get some of it out. And it’s not like he was ever, ever going to run into Benji Carhart again, right? “I’m supposed to be here with my boyfriend.”

  “Oh?” Benji looked past Reign at the couple on the other side of him. “I gather he couldn’t make it?”

  “I found him in bed with someone else a few days ago.”

  Benji winced. “Ouch. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be.” It was Reign’s turn to shrug. He wasn’t looking for pity from Benji. He had asked what Reign’s story was, after all. “Shit happens, right?”

  “Yeah, but that’s still shitty. You don’t deserve to have things like that happen.”

  Reign couldn’t help but smile. Sure, objectively speaking, Benji was right. Reign didn’t deserve to have something like that happen. Nobody did. But it was still a little strange to hear a complete stranger say it out loud.

  Except that with each passing minute, Benji didn’t really feel like that much of a stranger anymore, and it was sort of refreshing to hear someone speak so bluntly.

  “I’m not gonna disagree with you there,” Reign said.

  “So, if you’re not here with anyone, and I’m not here with anyone, I guess that only leaves one thing…”

  Reign’s eyebrow shot up as Benji’s voice trailed off. Of course he wasn’t going to suggest… was he?

  “You can be my wing-man,” Benji continued. “And I’ll buy you a drink.”

  Reign laughed, loud and hard. It was the first time he could remember laughing in… days? Weeks? Far too long, in any case. And it felt good. It felt like he might finally be starting to let go of some of the anger he’d been carrying around with him since Toby had left. There was still plenty of anger and resentment and tons of unanswered questions left, to be sure. But it was a start, and it was nice.

  “I think I’ll have to pass on the generous offer of helping you find a date,” Reign said, once he’d regained his composure. “But I will take you up on the drink.”

  Benji grinned, and it lit up the room. God, the man was pure sex on a stick. “That’s good enough for me.”

  He flagged the bartender down and ordered another round of drinks before turning his attention back to Reign. Meeting Benji Carhart was literally the last thing Reign had expected to do on this vacation, but so far it was turning out to be the highlight. And even if they might not have a damn thing in common at first glance, it had felt good to laugh, and to have a light, meaningless conversation with someone who didn’t know about all the rest of Reign’s baggage.

  It might not be the dream vacation with the man he’d loved, but it was turning out to be better than he’d anticipated.

  And that was good enough for Reign.

  “You really didn’t have to walk me back to my room,” Reign said as he fumbled with the little plastic card that should have opened the door by now. “I only had a couple of drinks…”

  From the corner of his eye, he could see Benji looking at him with a bemused expression, arms folded across that expanse of muscled chest that Reign had found increasingly difficult not to reach out and touch as the night had progressed.

  It was just so… big. And muscular. And… big.

  But he had resisted, thankfully—he might have had more than a couple of drinks, but he wasn’t that drunk. Or stupid.

  “I’m pretty sure I bought you at least four, plus those shots we did,” Benji smirked, and Reign wondered if they both might be having the same flashback to Reign’s reaction to the third shot of tequila. It had been pretty rough, and he’d no doubt made a memorable face. “Plus, I’m in one of the little cabanas around the corner, so it’s not like it’s an inconvenience.”

  Reign quirked an eyebrow as he mentally traced the steps from his building to the too-cute, too-expensive cabanas that Benji was talking about. He was pretty sure they were neither just around the corner nor convenient, but… too much tequila to argue.

  And his door had finally—thankyouJesus—opened, leaving him standing there propped against the door frame and smiling at Benji.

  “I should go to bed,” Reign said, not even trying to move.

  Benji nodded and smiled even wider. “Probably. Thanks for keeping me company tonight. It was… a lot of fun.”

  “Thanks for the drinks. And… yeah, for the fun.” Reign stood there for another moment, trying to decide if he wanted to say more, maybe take a chance and see if Benji had any plans for the following day. But no. He really should go to bed. “Good night, Benji. It was really nice to meet you.”

  “A pleasure,” Benji said. Then, with a little wave, “Good night.”

  Reign stepped inside the room and closed the door behind him before he could say or do anything ridiculous. God, a few drinks and he’d lost nearly all of his common sense.

  Benji was hot as hell, though. And he’d been so damn nice, that it had been difficult to keep in mind that he was straight. Or… probably straight.

  Almost definitely.

  Reign pulled his shirt up and shrugged it over his shoulders as he staggered across the room toward the bed. The last thing he needed was to go from having his heart broken to lu
sting after some unavailable mostly-probably-straight pseudo-celebrity while he was on vacation.

  That was just begging for trouble.

  He fumbled with the buttons of his pants and stepped out of them, leaving them in the floor with the rest of his discarded clothing as he tumbled into the huge, empty bed.

  Even though he knew he’d probably never see Benji again, it had been a really nice time. It had been a good distraction, a good release. A good sign that he might be starting to mend.

  It had been exactly what Reign had needed.

  5

  Benji

  Benji groaned as his phone vibrated on the bedside table.

  “Go away,” he mumbled, turning over and pulling the covers over his head. God, how many of those fruity island drinks had he ordered the night before? He hadn’t felt that drunk when he’d dropped Reign off at his room, but… he did vaguely remember getting into a slight altercation with a rather large shrub after that.

  His phone vibrated again. Or maybe it was still vibrating from the first time. It was hard to be sure.

  But… seriously? Wasn’t there some sort of rule about being on vacation where people had to leave you alone? Apparently someone hadn’t received that memo.

  He stuck an arm out from under the covers and grabbed his still-vibrating phone, then rolled his eyes when he saw it was a series of texts from Chase.

  Shouldn’t he be busy doing honeymoon things with Jackson? What time was it in Paris, anyway? Benji wasn’t even sure what time it was at his own hotel, but it sure as hell felt early.

  He rubbed his eyes and looked at the screen again. Oh, ten minutes after noon. So… not especially early, after all. Still, he couldn’t help but feel that Chase was breaking some sort of vacation code.

  Benji sighed as he read the continuously growing series of texts.

  What’s up?

  Benji?

  Bro?

  Are you having so much fun that you can’t answer your phone?

  Benjiiii

  Seriously, Benji. Call me.

  Benji rolled his eyes again. Was it possible to get eye strain from doing that? Dislocate an eyeball? If so, Benji was definitely at risk at the moment. He started to type out a text, only to be interrupted by another one from Chase.

  Whatever. Fuck it. Vacation code or not, Chase was clearly not going to give up until Benji actually called him.

  The phone barely rang once before Chase answered it, sounding way too cheerful, no matter what time it happened to be in Paris.

  “Hey, bro. What’s up?”

  “You tell me. You’re the one who sent thirty-seven urgent texts while I was trying to sleep.”

  “Sleep? Really?” Chase made it sound like some kind of crime. But wasn’t that what a vacation was supposed to be all about? “Isn’t it the middle of the afternoon there?”

  Benji frowned. If Chase could dial back the happy-go-lucky by about five notches, that would be awesome. “I don’t know what time it is,” Benji lied. “Anyway, did you need something? I assume you guys are having a great time in Europe.”

  “Oh my God, Benji, it’s the best. If it wasn’t our honeymoon, I’d make you get on a plane and join us. You don’t even know what you’re missing.”

  Chase was right about that, at least. Benji really didn’t know what he was missing, aside from swarms of people all trying to look at the same old buildings. And fancy food that he couldn’t pronounce. But if Chase said it was great, Benji was happy to take him at word.

  “I’m glad you like it,” he said, hearing his brother’s contented sigh on the other end of the line. “But seriously, if there’s not anything else, I’m gonna go back to sleep.”

  Benji knew he should probably try to feign a little more interest, but God, his head was pounding. He was going to have to seriously limit his alcohol consumption for the rest of his stay on the island. Or at least for the rest of the day.

  At least until dinner…

  “No, there is something else,” Chase insisted. “Have you been down to get a massage yet? Have you checked out the spa?”

  Benji did his best to stifle a sigh. “Yep. Massage. Spa. They’re great.”

  “Mhm, oh, really? Then why did they say you haven’t made any appointments for any of the amenities when I called to check this morning?”

  Benji half-laughed, half-snorted as he rolled over and punched his pillow. Why had he thought it would be a good idea to call Chase? In hindsight, coffee would have been a better use of his time.

  “Oh my God, Chase. Stop. Weren’t you the one who was telling me to relax? I’ve been relaxing. But the conversation we’re having now? Definitely not relaxing, bro. The opposite of relaxing, in fact.”

  “Fine. I’ll stop. But I made you an appointment for a massage in an hour, and while you’re down there you might as well check out the rest of the spa, too. At least the steam room.”

  “You’re killing me, you know that?”

  “I’m serious. When is the last time you’ve had a massage? Ever? Take advantage of that shit, Benji.”

  “Okay. If I go, will you leave me alone about it? Like, no more questions, ever?”

  “I promise. No more questions.”

  Chase’s voice had a hint of laughter, and Benji knew that he’s never be able to keep that promise. But on the off chance that it would at least buy him a few days of peace, it would be worth it.

  “Fine. Great. Massage in an hour. I’ll be there.”

  “Perfect.”

  Benji hung up the phone before Chase could try and talk him into anything else, like aromatherapy or electric shock therapy, or who knows what.

  A massage wouldn’t be so bad, though. Right? Maybe?

  Just thirty minutes or maybe an hour of a stranger putting their hands all over his naked body. Benji shuddered. It didn’t sound relaxing at all. But if it would get Chase off his back? He was willing to make the sacrifice. Hell, he’d have two or three massages if it meant he could have some peace and quiet.

  And now, he had fifty-seven minutes until he had to be downstairs in the spa. He was finally—finally—going to get at least a little more sleep.

  Benji cracked an eye open.

  “That’s the end of our session, Mr. Carhart.”

  He blinked and looked around.

  Jesus.

  The last thing he remembered was lying down on the table and the masseuse working the warm oil into the muscles of his back. Between the surprisingly relaxing massage, the quiet music, and the scented candles scattered around the room, he must have passed right out.

  It was a detail that he’d probably leave out when he told his brother about the massage.

  “Oh, um, thank you,” Benji said, trying to preserve his modesty as he readjusted the towel around his waist and hopped off the raised table.

  “Your clothes are in the adjoining room, but the steam room is right across the hall if you’d like.” She smiled and shrugged a little. “You’re dressed appropriately, anyway.”

  Benji snorted. Had she been taking orders from Chase? Fine. Great. Whatever.

  “The steam room sounds nice,” he lied, mirroring her smile as he walked out the door and across the hall where she’d indicated.

  As soon as he opened the door, Benji was hit with a wall of hot steam that caused him to suck in a sharp breath as he regained his bearings. A few feet away, he could make out the shape of another person—a man, based on the thin but noticeably muscular body—and he gingerly made his way over to the bench a polite distance away.

  Benji wasn’t exactly sure about steam room etiquette, but he figured the best course of action would be to mind his own business and not speak unless spoken to. Hopefully, they’d both be able to relax in peace and quiet for a few minutes—or however long he was supposed to sit there and sweat—and then Benji would get up and leave.

  As his eyes adjusted to the dim light and the thick steam, he risked a quick glance over to the other man. Was he sleeping?

&nb
sp; “Benji?”

  Shit.

  Benji’s eyes widened when the man said his name, but there was something familiar about the man’s voice, the man’s body, his dark hair and lean runner’s build.

  “Reign? Is that you?” Benji leaned in a little closer, until he could clearly make out more of the other man’s features. The first thing he noticed was the unmistakable bright smile.

  The second thing he noticed was that Reign was ripped. Benji was no slouch in the gym, and as far as pure muscle mass, he had Reign beat by a mile, but… damn. He could clearly see the muscle definition on the other man’s arms, his chest, and his clearly defined six pack abs.

  As someone who spent hours in his home gym every week, Benji was impressed. He had to admit that Reign was a good looking guy—objectively, of course.

  “I didn’t expect to run into you here,” Reign said, laughing. “Or are you just following me?”

  For the first time all day, Benji cracked a smile that was authentic. “Maybe I wanted to check on you after last night. You had quite a few drinks, as I recall.”

  “We had quite a few drinks,” Reign corrected him. “And I’m pretty sure you were the one who was plying me with liquor, if we’re gonna get technical.”

  “That’s a fair point, I guess.” Benji shrugged. “You have to admit it was fun, though.”

  “Yeah, I’ve definitely had worse dates.”

  Benji quirked an eyebrow at the statement, but laughed it off. Reign knew it hadn’t been a date. He was just being sarcastic. Right?

  Although, if he was being honest, Benji had also been on his fair share of dates that hadn’t been nearly as fun as the time he’d spent with Reign the night before.

  “Maybe it’s fate,” Reign said, shrugging.

  Benji cocked his head to the side. “Fate? Maybe what’s fate?”

  “That we both ended up here today. I mean, think about it. Neither of us could find dates last night—”

  “I wasn’t really looking for a date, to be fair,” Benji interjected. “But go on.”